I Fix My Thinking ...


Life stories always seem to help us learn and grow because we can relate to the experiences of others and we realize we're not alone.  I'd like to share a story of someone I know who didn't try to fix the problem, but instead, chose to fix her thinking, and the problem fixed itself.

The story is about a couple, for the sake of anonymity, her name is Marie and his name is Ivan.  Marie and Ivan have a happy, loving relationship and have been married for many years.  But lately the expectations they have placed upon themselves, and the challenges of everyday life have seemed overwhelming and exhausting.  Work, finances, taking care of others, taking care of their home, managing their growing "To Do" list was taking it's toll on both of them. 

Marie noticed more and more how she had become annoyed and frustrated with things that Ivan did.  She found him to be inconsiderate, moody, and difficult to get along with.  Ivan found Marie to be impatient, judgmental and short tempered.

Sound familiar?  When the stressors of life gain momentum and feel overwhelming, our relationships, whether at work, with family or friends, tend to reflect the feelings of stress we're experiencing.  The more we focus on what we consider "problems," the more they show up.  Whatever is the focus of our attention, the universe responds in kind.  It's like the Law of Attraction responds to our thoughts and feelings by saying, "Here you go! Here's more of that."  

In her desire to feel better, Marie remembered a practice she was taught to help her get her feelings in alignment.  She realized she was not being mindful and her thoughts of negativity were not serving her.  She wanted to get to that feeling place of love, happiness, and joy; that feeling place of alignment with all that is.  

Marie took some time to herself and began the "I Love & Appreciate List."  She remembered that when we write things down the energy around it is enhanced.  She began her list with things that were easy to think about in a loving, appreciative way.  She appreciated the sunny day, the flowers beginning to bloom.  She appreciated the comfort of her home, the area in which they lived.  She appreciated the abundance of food they had, all the individual conveniences of their home.  As she wrote, she could feel a shift, she began to feel more at ease.  

She started to write about Ivan.  She wrote how she appreciated his sense of responsibility.  She appreciated his participation in their home.  She appreciated how he liked to cook.  She appreciated how he was creative, and funny.  As she continued, more and more thoughts of appreciation came to mind.  By the time she finished her list, she felt better and was grateful for the shift.

Marie continued to make her lists over the next few days.  Then one day, shortly thereafter, Ivan came to her and said he wanted to talk.  He began by telling her how much she meant to him, and how their relationship was the most important thing in the world to him.  He told her he realized he was feeling exhausted and overwhelmed by everything that was going on in their lives, and perhaps it was time for them to discuss how they could make things easier for each other.  He also suggested it might be good for them to take some time for themselves and go away for a little while.

Marie was so Happy to hear Ivan say those things to her.  she was also stunned, then she realized what had happened.  By changing how she was thinking and feeling about Ivan, she created a different point of attraction.  In the process of making her "I Love & Appreciate" List she shifted her thoughts and feelings about Ivan to a positive place where she acknowledged and felt love for him by being mindful of his positive aspects.  The Law of Attraction responded with, "Here's some more of that!"

Whether it is a relationship with your significant other, your co-worker, your children, or your friend, when we are mindful, check in on how we are thinking and feeling and do what we can to adjust to a place that feels better, our experience changes.  We create a shift in our energy and our point of attraction.      

Marie and Ivan are working to resolve the overwhelm and stress in their lives.  They are doing it together and are working to be mindful to keep their thoughts in appreciation.  They have had their ups and downs, but they continue to go back to love and appreciation knowing if they fix their thoughts, their problems will fix themselves!